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Thousands of ravenous, bloodthirsty
rats are alive and starting to harass the residents of New
York City. Not only are these genetically altered creatures
smarter, stronger and bigger than normal rats, they've also
acquired a taste for human flesh...
This,
obviously made for TV movie, (you can see where some of the
fades have been engineered to cater for the adverts) is beyond
silly. Though, sadly, the production is played entirely straight
- not one intended joke in sight.
A
winning formula, surely. Take an animal that scares people
and have lots of them as the main baddie. So that will be
spiders or other creepy crawlies, snakes or rats then. So,
are the rats really scary? Well, in a word, no! When the female
lead is attacked in her car by a single rat I laughed so hard
that the office next door started banging on the walls. And
when the vermin take charge of a swimming pool, which is packed
with children, we are led to believe that there are hundreds,
possibly thousands of the little blighters (rats, not children).
Yet, when we see the children in the pool there isn't a rat
in sight, and when we see the rats they are in little groups
of five or six and seem to be in a totally deserted pool.
It also doesn't help that we are subjected to some very bad
computer special effects.
The
movie tries to go down the Jaws
plot route - the local officials know about the problem, but
there are a number of conventions and award ceremonies about
to be held in the area, so they don't want to worry anyone
unjustly even when compelling evidence is available. This
would have worked if it had been original which, like most
of the movie, it was not.
There
is one scene which struck me as original. Towards the end
of the movie (I don't think I'm spoiling anything here) the
female lead falls onto a huge pile of the rats which then
completely cover her.
This
movie brought home to me the ludicrous certification system
in this country. Can anyone explain why season one of Stargate
SG-1 has been classified 18 purely because one of its
episodes shows a totally naked woman, yet The Rats has
been classified 12 despite the fact that we get to see an
ear being graphically ripped off a victim as well as see a
half devoured human carcass with rats running around an exposed
rib cage? A naked woman - tastefully filmed as well - is surely
more agreeable than scenes of violence and brutality? Perhaps
not in this day and age.
Only
those with a low boredom threshold who are also really, really
scared of rats will find this anything other than a yawn.
Pete
Boomer
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